Week In Review

Well, I still have not gotten back to normal. I've been doing research and putting some things into perspective.

I'm further disappointing myself with my lack of motivation and drive. I'm hoping to reestablish my balance soon. I think I went from nothing to everything as fast as I could and just burned myself out. I'm feeling progressively shittier about myself. I have ever intention of changing that. I know these are not the things you'd like to hear but I'd rather say how it really is than lie to make myself feel better.

Phase 2 has come to an end. The plants have grown a lot, don't get me wrong but they bear nothing. However, I will say that through this process I have learned an incredible amount. Also, if nothing else, we've also made plans for a spring crops and started making plans for 2 to 3 different greenhouses at possible bug-out locations. Talking with friends who are in the process of buying their first house, we've decided to work together and put in some crops of all kinds at their place as long as everything comes together nicely.

Stockpiling is moving along, previously I've inventoried my food stuffs and it was pretty pitiful. I've assessed my current situation and made a budget plan to continue stockpiling without breaking the bank. I have a list of financial goals that I've set for the next 6 months. My first is to take care of two guys that have graciously ignored my debt to them. While not much I feel its only proper to take care of them first.

In the next two weeks I'll be purchasing a stove and some extra propane bottles so i can test them and learn to work with them so its not brand new when I have to use them. Thanks to my mom and dad I've added some ammo and a few other things to the collection. They gave me some kick-ass birthday gifts.

The next thing is a little weird but I felt it needed to be done. In a lot of books I've been reading I constantly read "you get what you put in" when it comes to your body. I needed to know how much of that was truth and how long it would take before you saw results. Well, I did it and needless to say its true. Very true. This week I went and ate what I wanted and just lived a really relaxed life. There was zero gym time, shitty diet, no vitamins, and lots of tv time. It took 2 days to start to see results. Fatigue, short attention span, and making mistakes constantly. Monday through Friday I just did what i wanted. By Wednesday I was a little tired, sluggish, a little cranky, and catching mistakes left and right. It went downhill from there. By Friday I was back to feeling tired by 10:00am, I was making mistakes constantly, my already short fuse had decreased substantially, (just noting this) zero sex drive, very sluggish, nodding off, and absolutely zero motivation. When SHTF a balanced diet and exercise must become mandatory or you will not survive. It took two days to feel the effects for just going to a manual labor job that doesn't take much thinking just alot of doing, think about how it would effect you if you have to fight to stay alive. That experiment is done. The alarms are reset on my phone to remind me to take my vitamins and supplements. I'll be reestablishing contact with gym buddies to go back.

Finally, I'm working on a plan for a bug in/bug out weekend. I don't know who would be interested in participating in my area but it would be a great way to see how your gear and you would handle it. I'm thinking what I'll do is take half a dozen scenarios and put them into a hat and draw one with everyone participating watching on a Friday night and see how far we can go before realizing we're unprepared. I plan on taking notes all the time so I can review them later to make proper changes.

Thats all for now. I know I ask alot of advice from everyone but, I really need some advice now. I've lost drive and motivation. I need to get back into it. Anyone have any ideas?